The Treasure Beyond the Mountain

Have you ever looked at the horizon and wondered what is just beyond sight? Or driven by mountains and wondered what is beyond the peak? Or what would have happened if you would have tried to go after a dream?

This past weekend, I went to Huaraz, Peru for a second time in two years. This place is magical with a valley surrounded by lush greenery, and just beyond it, snow capped mountains that touch the sky. The scenery is picturesque and I wonder if it is just a backdrop like the ones from The Wizard of Oz.

We challenged ourselves with a hike to Laguna 69 in the Huascaran National Park which is over 14,000 feet. The bus dropped us off three hours north of where we were staying in a valley surrounded by snow covered mountains, rivers overflowing from the rain, too many waterfalls to count, and pre-incan structures as we walked. We walked, and walked, and walked.

Up the mountains we went. Through the rivers we forged. And each moment was a test of physical fitness, but even more so of emotional capacity. My eyes were locked to the ground as I focused on my feet so I wouldn’t trip over rocks or roll my ankles. And when I thought of it, I looked up and enjoyed the amazing scenery around me. However, as the hours went on, I began to doubt myself. I wanted to turn around and to quit. I couldn’t breathe, sweat dripped down my face and as the cold wind blew I began to shiver. Being over 14,000 feet, the oxygen was minimal and I became lightheaded every few steps. Each minute was a rollercoaster of confidence and self-doubt. As we made it up over the ridge after two hours of very strenuous hiking, I had expected to see the aqua blue lake waiting on the other side. However, instead, I saw a tiny black lake and another pasture to walk through. And just beyond that, I saw small dots of color climbing up a second ridge. They looked like small ants that seemed miles and miles away. In that moment, my head dropped and all I could do was sit down.

As I sat there, I looked around me. I looked how far I had come, but how far I still had to go. In that moment, I saw progress I made in my life, and yet, how far I must go. I saw all the obstacles I overcame and all the challenges I had risen above. However, I saw all the adversity ahead of me and all of the lessons I will learn about myself and who I am. I had a choice. I could take the comfortable option and stay put and wait for the others to return in a few hours. I knew I would be perfectly content sitting on that rock. Or, I could stand up, throw my backpack on and keep pushing, which is something I am more familiar with. I am not one to sit. I am not one to surrender. And by God, I am not one to give up. So, I decided to take the mountain head on for that moment and for every moment in the future.

After another hour of even more challenges and even harder hiking, the trail opened up to the most beautiful sight I have ever seen. I reached the second ridge and once again, no lake. But, it was flat land. I heard voices just ahead. There was hope! I was almost there. I began to run. I clasped my backpack around my waist and stumbled over rocks as my legs were shaking from the trek. And that was when I rounded the curve, the curve that lead to the treasure.

What I love about trekking is you never know what is just round the corner. And, as I rounded the corner a bright, aqua blue lake filled my sight. The aqua lake was surrounded by white rock and snow. There was a glacier high to the right and the sun was popping out to show the real beauty of this natural phenomenon. There was a tall thin waterfall that fell from the glacier as it poured into this water calling my name. I found the treasure.

So, now I am back in Huanchaco and another mountain has been put in front of me. I am sitting back on that rock staring at the second ridge and searching for the strength to keep going. However, if I do not climb that ridge, I will never see the treasure that will change my life. So, I have a choice. And I am choosing to put my fear and nervousness aside to climb that ridge and seek the treasure that has the potential to be mine.

Too many times we go through life observing the beauty of the mountains, but we never take the chance to climb them. We second guess ourselves and the power we have within us. Yes, the mountain is hard. Yes, you will want to turn around. And yes, you will think you were crazy to think you could do it. But, you will make it over that ridge and you will see the treasure just beyond it, or maybe you will see a second ridge to climb. But, believe in you and the potential you have to find that treasure. One thing I know for sure, is the treasure will never come to you. You must always search for the treasure, to take the risk, and you must be the one to go for it. For it wouldn’t be treasure without the adversity, right?

Love, Peace, and Amity,

Jillie

In a Moment.

We knocked on an old rusty door that trembled every time her knuckles made contact with the metal. The dogs were barking inside as we were warned not to enter because the children’s mom was not home and the dogs would bite. We looked through the side window that had plastic bars coming down to prevent intruders from trespassing. The bars made the building look more like a prison than a home. We heard children playing inside, laughing, and a TV blaring in the background. My friend, Coco, looked at me and motioned to enter anyway, “This family is very special to me.” She said, “Come in and you’ll see why.”

We walked in to the dirt floors and there was a tarp hung to distinguish the front part of the home from the bedroom. As I turned the corner I saw a little boy sitting on the dirt floor with cards. I looked up, another small boy was sitting in his bed with something hooked onto his face. An oxygen tank about 5+ feet tall sat next to his bed and rubber tubes connected him to that unmovable tank. He was a young Peruvian boy with olive dark skin, but his face was “gringo” like, pale and lacking in color. As he saw Coco, his eyes lit up and a smile spread across his face showing his perfect teeth. He reached for her to give her a hug and as soon as she kissed him on the cheek he began to cough. It was a cough that rumbled his bones as he gasped for breath to replenish the oxygen he was already lacking. Coco turned to me, “This is what happens when he gets too excited. He coughs and he can’t stop. I haven’t been to see him in three days and I got him too excited. I normally can come and see him every day.”

On the table beside his bed he made people out of pipe cleaners, colors of blue, red, green, yellow. There was a man and woman with big hearts that was set apart from the rest of the art. Jaimie, the little boy on oxygen, made Coco and her husband with the pipe cleaners he was given. He made them with two big hearts at the center of their chests. Just as I picked up the artwork to touch the heart, Coco reached for a fan to fan off Jaimie as he continued to cough. He could barely breath, but he managed to smile at her. He was hunched over because the coughing had taken every ounce of energy he had, but feeling her fan him he looked up and his eyes were big and bright. He loves her.

Tears welled up in my eyes as I watched this little boy struggle to breathe and Coco with her beautiful smile and loving heart ask about his day and what he has been doing. She devoted every ounce of attention she had to this boy who idolizes her.

I looked around the place this boy calls home. On the other side of the tarp is their living area. Within three feet from each other there are two beds. One for Jaimie and one for his mother and brother to share. The dirt floors create a dusty film over everything in the house. The sheets, once white, are now beige. Things were piled on top of each other due to lack of space. Jaimie’s oxygen tank looked cast iron and had another bag hanging from it, too heavy to wheel around anywhere. The oxygen tank is saving Jaimie’s life. However, at the same time, it is keeping him trapped in his house and in his bed every moment of every day. These tubes in his nose are allowing his heart to beat, but keeping him prisoner from living his life.

My hand was pulled, it was his little brother holding a deck of Uno cards. I sat down in the dirt next to him and he passed the cards between us. I noticed this ripped deck of Uno cards was missing most of the numbers and colors. This deck had been shown so much love, it barely existed anymore. It made me think of all the board game I had growing up that we never touched after Christmas morning. What happened to these games and why were they not given to someone who appreciated them?

As I sat there playing with little Manuel, I listened to Coco talking to Jaimie. Manuel and I were laughing, teasing, and playing together while Jaimie and Coco were doing the same. In this house that appeared to have nothing, with a boy severely ill, in that moment nothing was lacking. We had love, time, joy, and companionship. In that exact moment, we had every thing we needed. All was well in our world.

As we left, Coco informed me of the situation. Jaimie was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis a few years ago. He was hospitalized and was told he could not live without oxygen. Jaimie looks like he is 7 years old, but is really 15 years old. Due to the lack of oxygen the nutrients were not spread throughout his body as he grew, so there are parts of him that are deformed. Last year, he had a heart attack. He now only has use of half of his heart and a small percentage of his lungs. His family cannot afford the oxygen and so Coco does fundraisers in Sweden (where she is from) to help his family keep Jaimie alive. Last week, there were no donations made.

I am living in Huanchaco, Peru where I am volunteering for three months with women and children in this area. Right now, I have started a crochet group for the mom’s of this community to crochet products for me to bring back and sell in the U.S. I will then send the proceeds back to these families, like Jaimie’s, to use for food, medicine, schooling, and whatever else they need. This is a small contribution I hope to make for the greater good of this community.

Being here and seeing some of the things that I have seen has made it very hard to see the light. I often question, what am I doing here? Am I making a difference? Or am I showing these amazing people the lack they have in their life? It has been a debate I go through every day. However, it is in these moment where I am shown the pure light that can happen in any circumstance. In these moments, I am shown what is truly important in life. If I could give any gift to the world, it would be for every person to experience these moments. A moment outside of yourself. A moment where there are no boundaries between you and another person, there is no race, gender, age, or socioeconomic status. It is just us, pure beings of light and love.

So, I am giving you this gift to share with me as I experience these things. Give a moment to yourself to appreciate the beauty that is held everywhere. See the beauty in yourself, see the beauty in others, see the beauty in the world. Only then can the light really be shared.

Love Yourself

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The past few months have been crazy busy. There have been amazing opportunities that have arisen and so many inspirational people that I have met. Each and every day I am reminded of what my purpose and mission is. And that is something I want to continue to share with the world.

Self-love is something that is essential to wholehearted living. Self-love is when you truly and passionately love yourself. You understand that decisions you have made, actions you have taken, or circumstances that have happened to you do not make up who you are. You have a divine light within you that shines brightly into the world and nothing you can do can put out that flame.

Love Letters to Yourself is a project I have started to teach and promote the importance of self-love worldwide. This project is becoming a movement. I hold workshops and seminars to teach women about self-love and how to write love letters to themselves. The symbol of this love letter is the commitment we have to ourselves. It is a visual trigger to remind ourselves why we are loved, why we are important, and why we are worthy of love and success.

Until you love yourself, you cannot truly love anyone else. And until you love yourself, no one’s love with ever be enough. Many people are taken back when I say. However, I want to share this example. Picture walking in the city of Chicago and there is a homeless person on the street asking for money. You left your purse in the car or only have a credit card on you. You have NO change and NO money.  You have nothing to give them. If someone comes over to your house and you just got back from a three week long vacation and have not had time to go grocery shopping, you have no food to feed them. No matter how much you want to feed your friends or give money to the homeless, you have nothing. This is the same with self-love. If we do not have self-love, or love for yourself, you have nothing to give. You cannot share this because the pantry of your heart is empty. No matter how much you want to give and receive love, until you have it within you, it cannot happen.

There is good news! This love is within you, waiting to be ignited and shared! Everything you need is within you. All the love, validation, adoration, and knowledge you long for has been and will always be within you. The question is how to access it. And that is where I come in.

Through my workshops, women are set free and reminded how to love themselves. People are inspired to create the life they have always imagined. I am not an expert. I am a young woman who has been sent on my journey to define what love means to me. Through my journey I found self-love. I have my personal experiences and stories to share with the world and the passion to fill the universe. My goal is to create a support network for women and people on their journey, so they know they are never alone.

Self-love seems like a simple idea, but when we ask ourselves what is self-love and what does it mean? Many people cannot find the words to formulate a definition. When people go searching for the definition, that is where the journey begins.

Self-love is important because it is the birthplace of creativity, success, and authentic relationships. Self-love, for me, is to be authentic with who you are, accept yourself for all of your sides, forgive yourself for decisions you have made, and build yourself up to live life unreasonably and go after your dreams. Until we love ourselves, we will never think we are worthy of success. We will never take risks to accomplish those desires our heart longs for. We will never have a true and deep relationship with another person because we do not have the courage to be vulnerable. Self-love is the foundation to life.

I am here to encourage you to write a love letter to yourself. Find that love you have been longing for within you. Stop looking externally for approval because the approval you have been waiting for is within you.

After writing your love letter, if you feel comfortable, I invite you to send it to me. I am compiling a book full of these love letters, publishing it, and using the profits to support women’s empowerment, send girls to school, and take this message worldwide. Who knows who your letter can help and the journey it may spark?

You are beautiful, strong, capable, worthy, full of potential, and enough. You do not need to conform, change, or sacrifice who you are to be loved. You are perfect.

I would love to hear what you think about this movement. This movement will be taken globally and is something to be shouted from the rooftops. Love yourself, and thereby transform the world.

Peace, Love, and Amity,

Jillie

Send love letters to: loveletterstoyourself@gmail.com

Go After Your Dreams!

As children, we were ambitious, fearless, determined to be famous, change the world, and follow our passions. Which ironically, is the time period in our life where we are the most fragile and need the most assistance. At that point in time, we didn’t have the money, the education, or knowledge of what needed to be done in order to make those dreams come true. But, that didn’t stop us. Nothing could.

Here we are as adults, with the money, education, resources, and knowledge of how to put our dreams into action, and yet, we make up excuses not to follow through. Because of the fear and doubts we have, we limit our potential. And I’ll say it again, WE limit OUR potential.

There are people out there that tell children they shouldn’t follow their dreams, they shouldn’t be a fireman, police officer, singer, actor, or humanitarian. And many people look at those adults who tell children, they can’t, as ignorant and cruel. But, how are those of us who don’t follow our dreams any different? Although, we may not say children can’t do it, we are living proof of it. We are living our lives as fearful and doubtful people. Children may be dreamers, but they follow in the footsteps of those who they look up to. They copy the patterns they see and internalize the outer world. So, how is it different?

A few weeks ago, I was walking to work and a thought came to me. If we don’t have money we cannot give money; if we don’t have food in our pantry, we cannot give food; if we don’t have self-love, we cannot give self-love. We are the examples setting the tone for the generations to come. We are the ones who have the opportunity to create a better and brighter future for the world. And it costs us nothing, nothing except to live the life we have always dreamed.

So, go after those dreams, however little or big they may be. You have everything you need and I will let you in on a little secret. If you are following your heart and your passion, there is no way the Universe will let you fall. And here is an affirmation for you:

“All my needs are met with ease and grace. ”

I promise to lead by example with everything I teach and share. That is something I feel very strongly about, if I write it, say it, or speak it, I am doing it. With this being said, I wanted to share something that is following my dream and passion.

I have been doing workshops each  month teaching the importance of self-love and spreading love to everyone I know. Because of the dream I put out there of taking this globally, I have been given an opportunity to go to Peru. I have been asked to bring this message to a shantytown near Trujillo for three months. I will be teaching self-love, leadership development, women’s rights, and education classes. Because this is a volunteer opportunity, I have been fundraising to make this trip possible. So, I have made an indiegogo.com fund raising site:

http://www.indiegogo.com/projects/bringing-self-love-to-trujillo-peru/x/4174237

I am asking for support to make this dream come true. However, this dream is more than me, more than you, this dream is for women around the world, and ultimately, all of human kind. Please watch the video and pass it on to others who will want to support. And, if you feel like it resonates with you, donate! Any amount helps.

So, for this week, let yourself dream. What would you do if you couldn’t fail? What makes you feel most alive? Pretend all limitations are gone, where would you go and what would you do?

Dreaming of greatness,

Jillie